Courtesy, as so many good things are, of hellison - things I'm good at. Qualifications and self-effacement, as the rules demand, have been ruthlessly excised.
- Rig and run a fully functional theatre lighting grid from scratch.
- Serve as lighting designer, stage manager, or fight director for a play, and just as importantly teach others to do likewise.
- Read and interpret anything written in English, with confidence and fearlessness.
- Decide something I read isn't to my taste, or is just plain bad.
- Write my own poetry and have it be admired by nationally acclaimed writers.
- Look good in anything I choose to wear.
- Paint, draw, embroider, and take photographs.
- Understand postmodernism.
- Travel by myself across most of the UK without needing a train timetable.
- Find my way back home from anywhere, even if it involves walking ten miles with a pack and partly in the dark.
- Use a shovel, an axe, or a pickaxe safely and productively.
- Cut a respectable figure at a ceilidh, and keep up a decent rhythm with a drum.
- Read and understand at least undergraduate-level textbooks in any discipline I've looked at.
- Listen to a friend, keep them sane for an evening, and help solve problems.
- Start out with an empty collecting bucket and a crowd, and end up with a damn heavy bucket and a happy crowd.
- Ride a cross-country course, a dressage test, or a showjumping round. Ride a showjumping round, in good time, with a plate of jelly balanced on one hand, and still have all the jelly left at the end.
- Cook, and things people want to eat at that.
- Program in shell script or LPC, and do fairly complicated things at that.
- Write MUD clothing and jewellery people want to wear.
- [Censored to preserve innocent eyes]
- Research nearly anything. Find books people want to read, books they had no idea existed, books they need to read.